The Old Spotted Cow, Marston Meysey, Wiltshire (pub #994)   2 comments

The staff at the Old Spotted Cow are fantastic folks and deserve better than the yuppie douchebags that swarm like so many flies around an old, spotted cow’s arse.  In addition to the yuppies are the self-important lockjawed middle class middle-aged weasels and their shrew spouses.  I have toned down my opinion as the night has worn on, but hey, the staff were wonderful.

It took fifteen minutes to get a pint of Moles as the two male parental units (of the broods of screaming blights on society outside) monopolised the hosts’ attentions with change orders and intermediate payments with credit cards (sometimes for something as dear as a bowl of pork scratchings).  What a couple of wienies.

There are three interesting ales available, the Moles there to keep the LocALE certification (has to be from a brewery a short distance away, I think something like 30 miles).  I took mine out to the shade near a fence that some of the contraception malfunctions suddenly seemed obsessed with banging into.

There were yet more dickheads to come, including a couple on cycles wearing the full team outfits and form-fitting ballistic goggles, each wearing a giant Garmin and with little ride computers on their bikes.  They were soon followed by a couple of fat (no, really obese, American-style lard asses) in an Audi TT; as they waddled away from it the driver gave it the carlock/keyfob flip over the shoulder that screams, “I am going to make the waitress’ skin crawl, on purpose.”  [Side note: what the fuck are you locking up for?  You’re in the middle of fucking nowhere surrounded by people that can buy and sell you…. Oh, yeah, I probably look pretty dodgy.  Fair enough.]

2 responses to “The Old Spotted Cow, Marston Meysey, Wiltshire (pub #994)

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  1. Pingback: The George, Kempsford, Gloucestershire (pub #995) « The endless British pub crawl

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